Kindly Leave Bratislava

Here at YSAC we believe that a good Slovak joke is like gold dust. We invited Bohus Král along with a pan-full of examples guaranteed to make you clutch your sides.


What is doing a blonde when she is scattering popcorn over the transition for pedestrians ?
- she is feeding the Zebra.


Two blondes are talking eachother :
1st : Yesterday, I've got an orgasm, it was fantastic !
2nd : Well, we've got hungarian soup today, and it was very tasty too.


The daughter of a police-man is seeking for something in his clothes and she finds a little mirror in his pocket.
She looks at it and says :
- Mum, father has a girl-lover !
Mother looks at it and says :
- Oh, poor Joseph, she is so old and ugly.

(The policemen and their families are considered here as very dumb)


A doctor is sitting in his ambulance and suddenly there appears over him his angel.
angel - Doctor, you shouldn't so much smoke.
doctor - Also other doctors are smoking though.
angel - Doctor, you shouldn't so much drink.
doctor - Also other doctors are drinking though.
angel - Doctor, you shouldn't so much make love with your female-patients.
doctor - Also other doctors do that.
angel - But you are a veterinarian !


- Cheers, bloke, where have you been last 50 years ?
- In the prison.
- And what have you been doing there all the time ?
- I was thinking about life.
- And what have you found ?
- Nah, life is a big manhole...
- Nah not, it isn't.
- No ? Then not....


A prince comes to Sleeping Beauty, he remains with her for a while and then he leaves her. Then comes 2nd prince, remains with her for a while and then he leaves her. Thus it follows to the 5th prince, and when he leaves Sleeping Beauty, he sees how from far distance comes 6th prince. When they are crossing, the 5th prince says to the 6th prince :
- You can do with her anything you want, but in no way do not kiss her !


A PC freak is sitting by his computer, it's midnight, everywhere is dark, only monitor is glowing. Suddenly, there appears the death behind him. He gets startle and screams.The death says :
- Keep calm, I have came for your harddrive.


There meet two snails and one has bandaged head. The other asks him :
- What's happened ?
- Nah, I was running over the meadow and suddenly - there grows up a dandelion.


A man visits a doctor :
- Doctor, I have a feeling, everybody is ignoring me.
- Next, please...
---- A very ugly woman came home and says to her mother :
- Mum, today a man in the bus has spoken to me !
- Oh yes, my darling, and what did he tell to you ?
- Get off, you idiot !


A gamer dies and gets to the hell. After 3 days the Lucifer is calling Saint Peter :
- What have you sent me here ? He has killed all devils, he has slopped all boilers and he is still searching for some "exit to second level".


Two computer freaks are talking each other.
1st - Yesterday I was in a pub and I brought from there new babe.
1st - We came to my apartment and I started to putting off her.
1st - I've putted off her sweater, her jupe , her panties.
1st - I've seated her by my new notebook.
2nd - You have new notebook ? What processor is in there ?


- I was born in such a poor family, that fortunately I am a boy, because at least I could play with something.....


One about Bill Gates : (I'm sure he will be most impressed. Ed)

The son of Bill Gates is asking him : "Dad, what does mean to do a woman ?"
Bill Gates : "That means, that you choose the most beautiful chick of America, you take her into center of New York, you take her there into most luxury restaurant, you buy her there the most expensive and best meal and wine, then by your own helicopthere you take her into your villa and there you fuck her."
the son of BG asks : "Dad, and what about romantics ?"
Bill Gates :"Nah, that forged out the Linuxers to not have to pay."


Near a house that is burning one guy says to another :
- I smell caramel here.
- I know, my grandfather was suffering diabetes melitus.


What happens to a Romale person, who falls down under steam roller ?
- He turns to a CD-Rom.


In the store :

- How can I help you ?
- I would like to buy a colour TV set.
- Here you are, choose from our offer.
- OK, I'll take that yellow one.



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